For anyone that had stopped by in the past. I got off track on my previous writing trend (my adventure on a diet) and don't feel the desire to stay with that type of blog. I am changing over to something that I feel good writing about. Which will vary from day to day, and will suit my needs for whatever day it may be for whatever topic I feel like. Now lets begin...
Well, I used to keep up journals all the time in high school and college. It faded out as I grew up and entered the real world. I have attempted time and again to start a blog/journal, but tend to trail off after a couple days. Here's another honest go at it. I think it may be different, I always think it will be different. We'll see. I really should set asside time in my day every day to write. It has always cleared my head and I enjoy posting my completely honest thoughts.
It has been a strange couple of years. About this time 2 years ago I was starting to feel like I would never get pregnant and was really feeling down. I had been married for a year, had a house for a year, randy and I were both in stable jobs. Everything was perfect.
Here we are 2 years later with a 15mth old and everything is perfect, we might not have the money we had then, but everything else is better. I don't doubt my relationship. I love my family. I love Freya. I feel she has the perfect name, it was worth 5 months of research. I love Randy so much and depend on him so that I get completely paranoid that he's gonna cheat on me. I have no good reason to think it, but I can't help it. The feeling comes and goes with my paranoia and I just keep reassuring myself that he is faithful and the feeling will die down and I'll go back to being sane again for a while.
Freya is perfect. I love her so much. I try to be a reasonable person about things. But I still check that she's breathing from time to time during long quiet naps. I try not to think she is more than normal. She is smart, but all babies are smart and all parents think their babies are the smartest. She is vocally ahead of the books, but she didn't walk til 14mths which was a little behind average. She gets undivided attention from us, no siblings or other children to get in the way of her 1-on-1 life training. Not to say that other children always get in the way of a child's learning. I know there are things she would learn better if there were other children around. She does have cats, video games and tv to get in the way of her learning from time to time, but no one's perfect.
There are a few things I think I/we do differently from others. I don't try to rush her in growing up, but I want to make sure I'm not holding her back. I like to let her explore things that aren't baby proof without interference so she can learn not only skills, but also that limits are not always physical. I buy toys that are for ages 3 and up. I have a couple 3 and up toys that I can't believe would interest a 3 year old. I can see why children who's parents follow the safety rules would be stupid. I like to think of how people in pioneer days raised their kids. They had dirt floors, played with all the animals, ate food that wasn't kept in a refrigerator, entertained themselves with sticks and whatever piece of nature they found. Those kids survived (well most of the time) They didn't sanitize everything. They got sick and got better. I try to think, well if Freya did get sick or hurt we have the best medicine in history and she can get better.
Right now she's asleep. So far training her to go to late second shift hasn't been very productive, but it's only been 2 nights. I could get her up for a few hrs, but I want to train her to be in bed by midnight. I feel that would work best for our schedules, whatever they end up being. I am excited for the future. I know that my situation could be better, but I am loved and that's all I need.